People all are all about balancing things: work, family, and everything else in between. Sometimes, we drop the ball. Sometimes, something happens that make us lose our balance. Sometimes we fail at small things: keeping our New Year’s resolution, staying on a diet, starting an exercise regime, or controlling clutter in our homes. Sometimes we fail at larger things: overcoming an addiction, finding employment, or keeping our relationships together.
The failures we make on such large scales can make a negative impact the rest of our lives. Things like keeping a marriage together, persuading a child to make better choices, or overcoming debt can deal a major blow. In some cases, life deals us a major challenge, a very hard obstacle, and we can’t seem to pick ourselves up off the ground after.
Like any other muscle in our body though, the ability to overcome challenges is something that needs to be exercised and honed over time. This ability is in fact the most important muscle to build, because it gives you the confidence to face any challenge life throws your way.
The first thing to do when dealt with such an overwhelming obstacle is to acknowledge that you are experiencing it. Wherever there is adversity, there is the will to overcome. So many who have gone before us have experienced adversity in greater magnitude. I say this not to diminish the hardships that we face in our lives, but to remind ourselves that we shall overcome. This will not downplay our weaknesses but instead prepare us to face whatever is in our way.
Acknowledging that we are facing adversity reminds us that nobody is perfect and that we are among others who have tried, failed, and tried again. Failure is common and no one has monopoly over bad luck, or bad choices in life.
Too many times, our tendency is to blame others or look outward for anything, or anyone to accuse of conspiring against us – the universe, our luck, our loved ones, friends – anything else. But really, no one else has absolute control over our lives except ourselves. Let us take responsibility and own the problem. That’s the way to take control over the situation.
Do some damage control, take care of what you can and let go of the things you can’t control. It’s okay. Life is teaching us about perseverance – listen and learn the lesson.
Forgive. Forgive yourself for not seeing the signs. Forgive yourself for not making the right choices. Forgive yourself for your lousy luck. And if you find that your pain is caused by someone else – forgive others. We find freedom in forgiveness. We owe it to ourselves to find closure. It is the first step towards healing.
Ask for help. No man is an island and you’re not suppose to go through this alone. Rally your tribe around you and draw strength from their collective wisdom and care. Never lose hope. Adversity is easier when you share your burden with others. Let them help you. If this is a personal journey and something you have to sort out yourself, share your stories. Let others learn and draw strength from your experience. Share it with honesty and humility.
Rise. You can do this. Remember to: Stay Humble, Hustle Hard. Good luck!
Written by Jaie O. – The Help