The Covid-19 pandemic has taken away so much from us. For some, it has taken away livelihood. For a lot of us, it has taken away our chance to travel. For almost all of us, it has taken away the ability to celebrate together with friends and family. And for those who have lost loved ones, it has taken away our chance to grieve.

Every culture in the whole world has its own funeral rites, customs, and rituals. But, no matter how different we mourn for our loss, we all share a central element, and that is social connection. Physical distancing takes away our ability to comfort each other during a time of grief. It takes away the opportunity to be with other mourners. We essentially have to find new ways and rituals to honor death and to celebrate life.

Saying goodbye to our loved ones begins well before the funeral rites. Those who are lucky enough to be able to spend time with a loved one before they pass, make the moments count by making amends, having deep conversations, and affirming their bonds. These practices soften the blow of loss.

Strict isolation measures in hospitals prevent visits from friends and family, this is most especially true of Covid-19 cases. While these are critical safety measures to prevent the disease from spreading, these measures also hinder loved ones from saying their final farewells. Getting closure is an important step in the grieving process and the bereaved are deprived of this important step.

Funeral rites and traditions are designed to honor the legacy of the deceased. They also offer others a chance to provide the bereaved with emotional support – very instrumental in helping the bereaved in processing their grief.

We all experience grief differently and process it at different rates. If you or someone you know is experiencing grief, here are some things that might help.

There are different stages of grief (denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance). It is normal to want to get to the “acceptance” stage as quickly as possible. However, you might find yourself going back and forth through the stages. Work through your emotions at your own pace. People can be too helpful for their own good, and some, while very well-meaning, might offer advice about “moving on” that might not be taken too well or might not work for you. Just remember that your feelings are valid. There is no right or wrong way to grieve.

Practice self-care. Check the bare minimum requirements off of your list: get some rest, eat well, take regular showers, stay hydrated, write your thoughts in a journal, meditate. But self-care also involves reaching out to family and friends. Check-in from time to time and be each other’s support system. While you may not be able to do this face to face, you can arrange virtual catch-ups to help bridge the gap. Self-care also involves seeking help. Consider working with a mental health professional and exploring online therapy.

However, you choose to deal with grief, remember to give yourself permission to mourn. Be kind to yourself and to others. How do you deal with grief? Let us know in the comments. Remember to work smart and be a blessing to someone today. Stay safe and healthy!

Written by Jaie O. TheHelp

When you have a team of highly intelligent individual contributors or a handful of technical specialists, it is not easy to wrangle them together. They know that they are experts in their subject matter and therefore, you might find it hard to give them orders. However, your in-house experts are not bullet-proof. They do make mistakes and need to be coached from time to time.

Your high performers absolutely value precision and perfection and probably need very minimal intervention. They’re usually business-critical and are hell-bent on the perfect execution of a project. But when they do make mistakes, the business can take a critical hit. This is why it is important that they are coachable and that they listen to feedback when a pet project of theirs needs recalibration. So how do you coach an expert who does not take well to coaching?

Work towards a goal
When you initiate a coaching session with your subject matter expert, you have to have the end goal in mind. It could be: to work towards a better relationship with the rest of the team, to help increase your subject matter expert’s self-awareness, to realign your subject matter expert’s objectives with the objectives of the business, etc. Whatever the goal is, it has to be clear in your head. Otherwise, it would prove difficult to get your subject matter expert’s buy-in. Once you state your goal for the coaching session, it will make it easier for your subject matter expert to understand your point of view.

Get their perspective, then assert your own view
Speaking of point of view, it would be helpful for this and any coaching session if you can get the perspective of your subject matter expert. Ask them what steps they are proactively taking towards working on your shared goal. This way he or she will be able to identify and own up to their lapses instead of being told about their lapses. Understand their perspective before asserting your own. Be upfront with your observations.

Show them a few options
Ask them for suggestions on how they can do things better the next time around. Subject matter experts love action plans. Asking them for suggestions will give them a chance to draft their own “next steps” or a comprehensive “plan of action” list. This gives them ownership of the solution and therefore, they have more control implementing it. Nothing is stopping you from giving your own suggestions, too. Remember to keep a good balance of ideas.

Get them to commit
Once you get their suggestions, get their buy-in. Ask them which of their suggestions can they execute right away or which of the suggestions are they committed to move forward with. Ask for specifics: the when and the how. At the end of the coaching session, you should have your subject matter expert’s commitment to a suitable plan of action.

What are your coaching tips on handling difficult to coach employees? How do you coach subject matter experts? Let us know in the comments. Remember to work smart and be a blessing to someone today. Stay safe and healthy!

Written by Jaie O. TheHelp

Before the widespread devastation of the Coronavirus pandemic, there was a  smaller scale illness that has alarmingly swept the nation. It has left a lot of devastation in its wake and is being considered as a public health issue. Loneliness has long been tagged as a modern plague or an epidemic long before the coming of Covid-19. It affects both the young and the old and can inflict anyone from all walks of life. Long term loneliness has been associated with other mental illnesses such as depression, substance abuse, suicidal ideation, and increased stress. It even has physical manifestations like a weakened immune system, decreased sleep quality, and weight fluctuations. “Lack of social connection has a significant effect comparable to other leading indicators of risk for early death,” says Julianne Holt-Lunstad, Ph.D., a professor of psychology at Brigham Young University^[1].

In America, 61% of the population over the age of 18 struggle with loneliness. This epidemic intersects with another pandemic, Covid-19, and is causing added anxiety to those who are already suffering from loneliness. Safety measures like social distancing and working from home are necessary life-saving measures to curb the spread of the virus, but these measures can also affect mental health.

People are wired for intimacy and to find a sense of belonging. We have a biological need to be in social groups and to seek human contact.

With most governments telling us to stay home, practice social distancing when we do go out, and to avoid crowds and enclosed spaces altogether, a lot of people are missing the opportunity to connect with others. This means we have to get creative in finding ways to “keep in touch”. How do we nurture relationships and build social networks in a time of social distancing?

1. Call a friend or a family member – Give them a call to catch up, learn about each other’s lives, and see how they are coping. It is important to give them your full attention when you do call to get in touch. The quality of the conversation will depend on this, so make an effort to really listen. In turn, be open about your feelings, too. Let them know if you are struggling with loneliness. That gives your loved ones an opportunity to help you as well.
2. Call a therapist or counselor – A health professional will help you untangle your thoughts and talk about your feelings in a safe space, free of judgment. If you feel that your loneliness might be best shared with someone who could give you professional help, then, by all means, set up an appointment with a professional. Your mental health matters, especially during these trying times.
3. Join an online class – This will give you an opportunity to meet people even if your area is on lockdown. You don’t necessarily have to go out of your home but joining an online class will give you an opportunity to learn about something you enjoy and meet others who enjoy the same things as you.

These are extra challenging times. So be kind to yourself and seek help when possible. Do you have tips on how to prevent loneliness? Let us know in the comments. Remember to work smart and be a blessing to someone today. Stay safe and healthy!

Written by Jaie O. TheHelp

^[1] The Loneliness Epidemic Has Very Real Consequences, Collins

With over 40 million Americans filing for unemployment over the last 14 weeks, the unemployment rate shot up to 14.7%. A lot of Americans find themselves without jobs and are now thinking of other ways to earn a living. A lot of people are beginning to explore options like a change in career or starting their own business.

I understand that some of you who might be reading this would probably be making this decision purely out of necessity. You may have unfortunately been laid off as part of company downsizing or your business might have lost traction and had to close down due to the Covid-19 pandemic. All industries big and small have been affected. None of us can afford to lose our jobs.

However, your circumstances might cause a shift in your perspective. You might be exploring other options. You have probably mulled this idea over but just couldn’t find the right time to make a change. Some don’t know where to start and have put off the idea of jumping careers or starting a new business until they have it well planned out.

If you’re reading this because you find yourself out of a job, I’m very sorry. Know that my thoughts are with you. We will get through this. You and I both. Let me give you some tips on how to succeed in a pandemic stricken economy. I hope this helps.

These are the most in-demand jobs amid Covid-19:

Jobs in healthcare are the most in-demand jobs – Registered Nurse, Doctor, Healthcare Specialist, Licensed Practical Nurse, and Patient Care Technician, then Psychologist, Medical Assistant, Emergency Room Nurse, Certified Nursing Assistant, and Nursing Manager. If you don’t have credentials to apply for any of these, here are the top jobs in-demand in the U.S. based on LinkedIn data: Store Associate, System Operator, Certified Public Accountant, Healthcare Specialist, and Construction Worker, as well as Warehouse Manager, Psychologist, Vehicle Mechanic, Academic Advisor and Delivery Driver^[1]. Online business is also on the rise, with people needing supplies yet still having to avoid crowds. One good business to pursue is online selling of essential supplies such as food, pet supplies, household essentials, etc. Delivery service is also a good business venture to explore.

According to Forbes, these are the skills you should have in order to succeed in a post-pandemic world:

1. Adaptability
2. Flexibility
3. Tech Savviness
4. Creativity
5. Innovation
6. Data Literacy
7. Critical Thinking
8. Digital And Coding Skills
9. Leadership
10. Emotional Intelligence

The job market will be tight and competitive, so make yourself stand out by committing to acquiring these skills. Look for free and open online courses available on learning platforms such as Coursera, edX, Udemy, Udacity, FutureLearn, or iversity. Use the lockdown as an opportunity to learn and improve your skills. Any tips from you in order to succeed in a pandemic stricken world? Let us know in the comments. Remember to work smart and be a blessing to someone today. Stay safe and healthy!

Written by Jaie O. TheHelp

^[1] Most in-Demand Jobs Amid Covid-19, Confesor, 2020