You can spot the swagger from a mile away. These independent men and women who look like they’ve got it all together and have the world in the palm of their hands.
What makes you take a second look? Is the way they carry themselves with confidence? Is it how they seem to always be prepared for anything? Or maybe is it because they appear to be decisive and determined.
Whatever it is, you wish you had it. That certain je ne sais quoi that makes everyone wonder how you’ve got it all together.
Here’s one of the secrets to having the kind of chutzpah that people admire: it’s called self-reliance. Self-reliance is having a certain quality about you that makes you seem like the go-to guy or gal. It means having that ability to trust yourself and count on your own resources. It all boils down to knowing that you can do this – you got this!
Having the conviction of only having yourself to lean on is not an easy task. First, you must take care of the basics. The key to this is preparation. Get a job. This practically solves most of your challenges in the journey towards self -reliance.
A job affords you a lifestyle where you can pay for your own needs and not have to ask your parents to spot you some money or ask your friends if you can sleep on their couch. Once that is out of the way, you can concentrate on the harder values that you need to practice.
Second, be decisive and make your own decisions. Nobody makes right decisions, 100% of the time. NOBODY. But being self-reliant does not mean being right all the time. It means that you are confident enough to make an informed decision and, more importantly, to stick with it.
If things do go south, own up to it. It takes more moral fiber to own up to your mistakes than passing the blame on someone or something else. By taking responsibility for your decisions whatever the outcome may be, people will respect you more.
Third, like I always say, hustle. The only way people ever achieve anything that’s worth getting in this life is by the old fashioned way, hustle, patience, and hard work. And with this, you earn a superpower called grit.
Grit will get you places. While everyone else has given up, you keep on slogging through. Grit gives you staying power. Not only do you get to be self-reliant, you also become reliable to other people. Grit will teach you to be confident of your skills and reverently careful about your weaknesses. Just enough moxy to keep your ego in check all the while, paying attention to areas of improvement. Grit will allow you to begin to set your own pace. You wouldn’t want to risk a burnout so make sure to honestly listen to yourself as you create your own life’s path.
It is a journey, and we all get a lifetime to go and try what works for us. Self-reliance is NOT about never needing anybody. It is actually about being able to be comfortable in your own skin – comfortable enough that other people see the light growing inside of you. Until next time, remember to: Stay Humble, Hustle Hard. Good luck!
Written by Jaie O. – The Help